Surrender comes immediately following the point at which you are completely aware of your lack of alternatives. Surrender never comes during any point in which you think you still have them. Alternatives are the things that keep us from total surrender. Whether they’re good options is another matter entirely. It sounds noble, but fighting “to the death” always leads to just that, death, when all the while life was very much an option. It’s just a different life than you’d tried to orchestrate for yourself.
God has a keen interest in bringing you to a place of surrender. It’s the only place where you’ll let Him have you completely. There are two ways you get to this point. First, you go willingly. “Grant me a willing spirit…” (Psalm 51:12) Second, you must be taken there. This typically happens in one of two ways. Either God goes about obliterating your alternatives Himself or, more often than not, He simply gives you more rein and you eventually obliterate them yourself. The issue for Him is not the timing, it’s the destination. Love is patient, and God is love. (1 Cor 13:4, 1 John 4:8) He will wait.
You have never and will never see a fighting force of any kind surrender while they still believe they can win. Therein lies the issue. Do you still think you can win on your own? Do you still nurture hope even though you’re playing the field?
Surrender is not the same thing as giving up. When you surrender, the only thing you’re giving up is needlessly fighting for a way of life that has never and will never work.
“First of all, we had to quit playing God. It didn’t work. Next, we decided that hereafter in this drama of life God was going to be our Director. He is the Principal; we are His agents. He is the Father, and we are His children. Most good ideas are simple, and this concept was the keystone of the new and triumphant arch through which we passed to freedom.” (Alcoholics Anonymous pg. 62)
It may all begin with you simply being willing to surrender as opposed to up and surrendering wholeheartedly. Telling God you’re willing to surrender is a starting point.
The rest of your life can begin right there.
Mine did.