GOOD BYE LETTER TO MY ADDICTION
I wish I could feel the way I do today, before I met you. I cannot
believe all the 37 years of my life was revolved around you. I have
to admit I did love you. I enjoyed your company and I really loved
the way you made me feel. You made me feel loved. You took all the
pain, sorrow, guilt, and my depression away. I never had to deal with
anything because I had you by my side. Nothing in my life mattered.
It was all about me and you. I could never picture my life without
I had a baby boy who almost died because I was too much involved with
you. At that time in my life it was you who took all the pain and
suffering I had to deal with. With you, my whole life was a big foggy
cloud. At times I got so sick and tired of living in that cloud, but
you wouldn’t let me out. As much as I begged and cried to you, I was
your prisoner for so many years.
But today I have a few words of my own. I have lost so so much in my
life. You took my self-respect, my self esteem, my dignity, and my
hope. I sold myself cheap, mentally, and physically! You put me out
in the streets with my children, empty in and out. Today I am a
different person. I no longer need you as a crutch. I would crawl
today to get back everything you have taken from me; my self-respect,
my dignity, and self-worth. But most of all, there is one thing you
can’t or never will is take my sobriety…not this time around. I am
done with you. I know the road is going to get real bumpy, learning
to live without you. But I will do whatever it takes for however long
it takes. I wish you never existed because all you are going to do is
hurt or kill someone else.
Sharing the message behind Linda’s journey
*The lost sheep…
 Now the tax collectors and “sinners” were all gathering around to
hear him.  But the Pharisees and the teachers of the law muttered,
“This man welcomes sinners and eats with them.”
 Then Jesus told them this parable:  “Suppose one of you has a
hundred sheep and loses one of them. Does he not leave the ninety-nine
in the open country and go after the lost sheep until he finds it? 
And when he finds it, he joyfully puts it on his shoulders  and
goes home. Then he calls his friends and neighbors together and says,
‘Rejoice with me; I have found my lost sheep.’  I tell you that in
the same way there will be more rejoicing in heaven over one sinner
who repents than over ninety-nine righteous persons who do not need to
The beginning to today! 40 days of sobriety in Christ Jesus!
· Yes, Linda took herself to the hospital (Holy Family detox),
because she now has medical. (A new 4 day program) That was 40 days
She stayed in the hospital (room 310 detox wing) until she was well
enough to be sent to ABHS in the valley. There were 100 women at the
ABHS program! Linda voluntarily stayed through her 30 days. (She was
not court ordered!) Thirty days was all they would pay for since she
was not court ordered. This is the beauty of who Linda is in Christ.
· Over 3 years ago she walked into the Freedom House in Post
Falls (led by God) to seek Him and find Him (If He was real). She
wanted to know if she could find God and KNOW God like I do! She
wanted His power too. She gave her life to Christ and was released
from that program after 3 months with NO PLACE to go. Of course, she
lost her way and went back to West Side because that was her home.
The only home she had. (Homeless for years)
· That is where God’s mercy and love found me may years ago.
Finally, I get it. Finally I see it! Linda found Jesus and we had no
place to help send her. (Like the birth of Love in Christ at the
table! We will be stable when we get to Heaven but God also promised
On earth as it is in Heaven… Stable in the Light of His HOUSE…HOME)
· ROUND two! This is Your round Father, let’s knock out the
enemy in the power of Your Son Jesus Christ! The SON shine of our
LIVES! The HOPE of new beginnings!
Today, she is running after Christ. She voluntarily (again) went
through detox with God’s amazing help. Imagine, a beautiful room in
the hospital filled with God’s angels of LOVE (nurses) who are linked
to recovery outside the hospital. Women who loved her through her
journey to new physical health. Women who loved the Lord inside the
hospital! Wow! This is God’s DETOX with dignity! Too bad Thomas
Kinkade – (died of alcoholism in 2012) - didn’t have a buddy he could
walk with through doors like we found in Holy Family!
· Fast forward through Linda’s last years to today and you see
what God has and is doing.
She wrote this letter as an assignment. She was supposed to write her
feelings on paper for her to share with her small group. And when she
read it to me (yesterday) I wept tears of JOY… Tears and tears that
tear open my old “beliefs” that all people are just drunks (addicts)
who will never find their way. (Forgive me Lord but thank you for
never ever giving up on Linda. Thank you that I did not listen to
counsel from well-meaning believers to leave her to self-destruction!)
Linda was led by the Father! God was the driving force behind her
decisions. He carried her moment by moment with a heart transplant
to STAY under the shadow of His wings! Linda’s passion to seek Him
abounds today in a mighty way! We are in prayer and we surround her
as a body of Christ with a Hospital of recovery in the neighborhood
called Fell-On-Knee Flats! FFCC has 7 days of “God’s Treatment” (4
blocks from the lighthouse) where she can walk to and be centered in
serving others as she “stays centered in the Word.” She is on the
war path against the evil one.
THE LIGHTHOUSE HOME of HOPE! WE are a team. I am her buddy along
with two other leaders! Who would ever think I would buddy up with
a woman from the alley. A woman who came out of a family gripped in
evil! Evil? The Lord spoke to me just now…and said she was born into
a family of 14. They had no way to feed all the children so Linda was
prostituted out when she was 8. Not of her own choice! Evil has been
turned into GOOD and He is now A LIVE in her! This is what we are
allcalled to see. We are to stop pointing fingers for every finger
pointed there are 3 that point back to me! Wow! Today, God opened
the gate and led us through the TRUTH in Christ’s Name.
This is the dilemma of the addict. They need a BUDDY in Christ! They
need a person to pray for them, with them, and to believe with them.
Why we do what we do! Off-the-Broadway search and rescue! This is
the day that the Lord has made, I rejoice and I am sooooo glad in it!
The Father found the lost “1” and He used OBFO to plant the seeds.
Imagine, Linda watched us from the back alley off of Broadway for 7
years before she stepped into “trust.” Trusting Jesus is one thing,
but to Trust His leaders is another. She watched to see IF we were
“conditional” followers. She watched to see IF our love would STOP IF
she walked down the wrong path! She watched us. A wounded “child”
trapped in a body of an adult is now set free.
· Today, she no longer carries a hardened heart. She spends
every morning in the Word with her LOVE of her life…Jesus! She no
longer wakes up to the “Drug…”
Today we are meeting with Wendy at the Lighthouse to fill out her
application to stay as a LIGHTHOUSE resident. (Wendy detoxed Linda
over 3 years ago at the Freedom House in Post Falls) She is in the
outpatient recovery intensive care program at SPARCS. She wants it.
She is teamed up with AA meetings (she loves) and walks to the
individual group counseling sessions just 2 blocks away. She has
intense expectations from the program. She has to do UA’s and must
not lose track of her goal (in Christ) or she will fail. Her bullets
are the Word of God. She puts her armor on every morning (2 to 3
hours) before she walks out the door! She prays and waits for God’s
orders to march and she goes out… As the Lord guides her she is
becoming a new creation just like you and me.
We have our sister back. Embrace her in prayer and watch the miracle
continue to unfold!
In Christ, we are boarding the ARK! Activating Revolutionary Kindles
of Kindness My we sail out into the sea searching for the lost as we
go. Too weak to swim herself, Linda holds onto the life preserver in
Christ Jesus as we steer the boat to the lost little ones. Together,
the Father is using our relationship to lead others on board to His
perfect “LOVE BOAT” as our “G2’s God’s Gang” swim to help the drowning
on the streets of our city!
By the grace of God, she will be surrounded by His people who love her
to the way and path of Growth. Growing up we press on. (Teaching the
Word of God SWIMMING INSTRUCTIONS)
And this is the most amazing day – January 3, 2013; a day set free to
shine for His Glory as we tell His story of redemption!
Love in Christ,
God’s search for the lost sheep!
Tax collectors and sinners gathered to hear Jesus. Pharisees and
other religious people grumbled: “Jesus welcomes sinners and even
eats with them.”
So Jesus told them this story: “Suppose you have a hundred sheep an
lose one. Don’t you leave the 99 to search for the lost sheep?’ So
listen to me. There’s no greater JOY in Heaven when one sinner turns
away from sin. Much more than over 99 law keepers like you.”
Jesus and the Baby, lamb.jpg
Off-Broadway Family Outreach – PO Box 9813 Spokane, WA 99209
(509)998-2630 The Lighthouse of Hope for Women (509)688-5497
Art by Jan For Him! See the Lord? See the child? See the Lamb?
Cradled in the arms of Jesus may the mountain of our sinful addictions
melt away in to the sea of forgiveness as we love the lost to the One
who holds the Key to “Transformation.”
the letter from Linda is wonderful to read.